These are more headlines that are presented as real - whether they are or not - I love 'em. Here we go:
COLD WAVE LINKED TO TEMPERATURES
a simple start - no comment needed
MAN IS FATALLY SLAIN
Gotta hate when that happens - probably just meant to wound them
AUTOS KILLING 110 A DAY, LET'S RESOLVE TO DO BETTER
You gotta love a positive attitude
NICARAGUA SETS GOAL TO WIPE OUT LITERACY
They can start with newspaper writers and editors
NEVER WITHHOLD HERPES FROM LOVED ONE
Sharing is very important in a relationship
MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH
It is SOOOO hard to get reliable help
LAWMEN FROM MEXICO BARBECUE GUESTS
Want fries with that?
NJ JUDGE TO RULE ON NUDE BEACH
The bailiff should probably skip the "all rise..." part
SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM
Animal rights gone wild or just an Animal Planet show gone bad?
And the Journalism Award of the Month goes to this gem:
WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE
A Jimmy Carter devotee no doubt
Gotta go read the paper.
If you are truly pressed for time, just read the bold, italicized, and underlined sentences. That won't take you long at all! Another year has passed and if you are reading this, a new one is getting ready to start (or has started) for you. New Year’s celebrations are a time for reflection on what has happened and also a chance to start anew. New Year’s resolutions are a manifestation of this. Weight loss plans, gym proprietors, exercise equipment makers, and others know this. If you have watched any TV, gone online, or read any magazines or newspapers you know that the people that make their living selling and signing people up for those things are hitting it hard. We like new beginnings and the chance to reset and set new goals. Losing weight, stopping smoking, cut back or stopping drinking, and other things a lot of folks see as improvement are at the forefront of our collective thoughts and efforts this time of year. Although not a real advocate of New Year’s resolutions, I
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